Guilt {October 2996) (Runa)
Feb 12, 2018 12:46:37 GMT -5
Post by Ceolmund on Feb 12, 2018 12:46:37 GMT -5
“Can you promise me that you will stand up for yourself if you need? I don’t care if it’s a cook giving you the wrong food—please, let them know. Promise me you will take care of yourself.”
What would be the point of leaving, if he let someone there trod upon him the way his own Mother did here? He may as well stay for that and... he needed to go. If only for a time. Runa here in his arms made him already wish to come back before even departing.
“I will try,” was all he could answer. In a way, he wished his Mother had passed some of her arrogant self confidence on to him... well, perhaps not her arrogance. He took a deep breath. If he went into it, knowing he was doing it for Runa, maybe he could speak up for himself. He almost smiled at the thought of speaking to the cook. He doubted that would come up. He had never minded on the taste of food, as long as it was something to fill a body. Though good food he would notice, nothing edible had ever seemed bad.
“And…you’ll remember me?”
“Yes.” Ceolmund whispered. She was one of the only parts of Edoras he wanted to remember. “When I come back... you and I... we'll continue on right where we left off,” he added hopefully. In truth, his words were far more optimistic than he felt. He could hardly hope for it. He did not know how long he would be away; and Runa's life would go on like a bounding sunbeam in summer skies.
“You have to... keep practicing your left handed swing. And watch our nest in the spring...” Spring seemed a long way off. All the autumn, all the winter. The grasses would grow green again and the little birds would build their nests again, and lay their eggs. Ceolmund and Runa had watched the nest on the eaves of the Healing Hall most closely the past two springs, watching each successful brood of sparrows grow and feather out and fly.
He sighed and gave her a squeeze, holding her all the tighter. “Runa... you'll... be all right.” Maybe she was not right now, but once the men in the Hall were healed and back on their way. Once her life had settled again, and the winter winds and snows came, she'd have her warm hearth, in her happy home, with her pleasant family. She'd keep training under Hildred at the Hall and ever growing skilled in healing. She would have her friends, and have her uncles to keep supervising her training, and Captain Heruthain had never seemed to mind having her upon the grounds when the boys were working.
She did not truly need him. Not the way he needed her. Though perhaps, something told him she did. He had been reasoning it in his head over and over again the past weeks, and he could always come up with the list of reasons she should not need him. There was so much that made him unworthy of a friend like her. When he did come back, he would be better for her. A better friend.
All the while he had been sitting thinking, Ceolmund's hands had been trying to give what comfort they could offer to Runa. He slowly moved back to sitting now, needing to look to her face. He almost caught his breath as when he looked at her glistening eyes, he recalled again how near she was, and here at eye level to him, she seemed older once more. The young man slid his hands up her back to rest on her shoulders, holding her eyes for a long while as he decided what to say. Finally, he slid his hands up higher to cup each of her fair cheeks in his palms. He swallowed hard, though still could not speak.
Sometimes speech was not needed. Not even to discuss the weather. They both knew the night air was cool around them, and they could both feel the chill October wind. Ceolmund dropped his hands from Runa's face to slide down her back again, watching her face closely as he did so, then he drew her against him again in close embrace. It was warm between them, and they settled comfortably. When Ceolmund had said all night, he had meant it, though he had not imagined passing their time in this way. It seemed better than he could have imagined.
He knew Runa was exhausted from the Hall, and would likely rise early again to return. He knew he could not keep her long, nor late. The men would depend on her clear headed in the morning, but he was going to hold dear every moment he had. The color was now gone from the sky, having faded into a deep purple, and the moon was rising in the east, offering a pale glow to them where they were seated, to the cliffside, to the waving grasses on the hill, and illuminating the homes and the city wall beyond, though Ceolmund could not make himself look to much beyond Runa.
What would be the point of leaving, if he let someone there trod upon him the way his own Mother did here? He may as well stay for that and... he needed to go. If only for a time. Runa here in his arms made him already wish to come back before even departing.
“I will try,” was all he could answer. In a way, he wished his Mother had passed some of her arrogant self confidence on to him... well, perhaps not her arrogance. He took a deep breath. If he went into it, knowing he was doing it for Runa, maybe he could speak up for himself. He almost smiled at the thought of speaking to the cook. He doubted that would come up. He had never minded on the taste of food, as long as it was something to fill a body. Though good food he would notice, nothing edible had ever seemed bad.
“And…you’ll remember me?”
“Yes.” Ceolmund whispered. She was one of the only parts of Edoras he wanted to remember. “When I come back... you and I... we'll continue on right where we left off,” he added hopefully. In truth, his words were far more optimistic than he felt. He could hardly hope for it. He did not know how long he would be away; and Runa's life would go on like a bounding sunbeam in summer skies.
“You have to... keep practicing your left handed swing. And watch our nest in the spring...” Spring seemed a long way off. All the autumn, all the winter. The grasses would grow green again and the little birds would build their nests again, and lay their eggs. Ceolmund and Runa had watched the nest on the eaves of the Healing Hall most closely the past two springs, watching each successful brood of sparrows grow and feather out and fly.
He sighed and gave her a squeeze, holding her all the tighter. “Runa... you'll... be all right.” Maybe she was not right now, but once the men in the Hall were healed and back on their way. Once her life had settled again, and the winter winds and snows came, she'd have her warm hearth, in her happy home, with her pleasant family. She'd keep training under Hildred at the Hall and ever growing skilled in healing. She would have her friends, and have her uncles to keep supervising her training, and Captain Heruthain had never seemed to mind having her upon the grounds when the boys were working.
She did not truly need him. Not the way he needed her. Though perhaps, something told him she did. He had been reasoning it in his head over and over again the past weeks, and he could always come up with the list of reasons she should not need him. There was so much that made him unworthy of a friend like her. When he did come back, he would be better for her. A better friend.
All the while he had been sitting thinking, Ceolmund's hands had been trying to give what comfort they could offer to Runa. He slowly moved back to sitting now, needing to look to her face. He almost caught his breath as when he looked at her glistening eyes, he recalled again how near she was, and here at eye level to him, she seemed older once more. The young man slid his hands up her back to rest on her shoulders, holding her eyes for a long while as he decided what to say. Finally, he slid his hands up higher to cup each of her fair cheeks in his palms. He swallowed hard, though still could not speak.
Sometimes speech was not needed. Not even to discuss the weather. They both knew the night air was cool around them, and they could both feel the chill October wind. Ceolmund dropped his hands from Runa's face to slide down her back again, watching her face closely as he did so, then he drew her against him again in close embrace. It was warm between them, and they settled comfortably. When Ceolmund had said all night, he had meant it, though he had not imagined passing their time in this way. It seemed better than he could have imagined.
He knew Runa was exhausted from the Hall, and would likely rise early again to return. He knew he could not keep her long, nor late. The men would depend on her clear headed in the morning, but he was going to hold dear every moment he had. The color was now gone from the sky, having faded into a deep purple, and the moon was rising in the east, offering a pale glow to them where they were seated, to the cliffside, to the waving grasses on the hill, and illuminating the homes and the city wall beyond, though Ceolmund could not make himself look to much beyond Runa.